for once, almost was good enough

"

The first thing to understand is sometimes you can only express pain through poetry. Vague, riddled, and all in all concealing while revealing yourself. Our thesis proposed and understood, it is now time to reveal the grievance:

- Parents tell you not to trust strangers, to be careful when you cross the street. They do not tell you what happens when there are strangers in your head, offering you not candy but blood, and ripping your love apart on the floor. They let this car crash into you, it is not their problem.

- People hurt you, they do it all the time. We harden from this, we do, some with shells harder than others. When these people reflect their voices into your mind like an echo, trying to convince you they’re yours, this is no longer a shell. It’s a prison.

- Please believe me when I tell you I am not being picky, I am trying to save your life. I want to be the hero of this story but nobody else knows it.

- I am scared to like you, even more scared to love. It will create a beast in front of you or in front of me, or in front of both, and I will have to slay it. Every time. I’m tired but not to slay it would kill me more.

- If it’d be easier to die why can’t I be immortal? Because I would like to give that gift away, a distribution for the masses, so I don’t have to feel it anymore.

- Read it in Dante, or in Milton, the tortures of Hell. Imagine their internal loop, a cycle of torture. Now imagine it is the only way no one dies, no one suffers. Imagine it in you. You swallow, you keep going. I will slay every monster I have to at the end of this fucking book.

"

not all ocd slams are about love {g.s.}
Track: You Were A Kindness
Artist: The National
Album: High Violet (Expanded Version)
Plays: 9661

I’ll do what I can to be a confident wreck,
can’t feel this way forever I mean
There wasn’t any way for anyone to settle in,
you made a slow disaster out of me

Sept. 15 1:27 pm

kiarasnaps:

Laverne: Nicole, does your belief system now change, in which you now know you don’t need him to be there? 
Nicole: No. I think what happens is it turns into less a conversation about my blackness and more about relating to humanity, because that’s really what we’re trying to do. We’re just realizing that people are capable of doing it. We’re underestimating people because people said we weren’t viable. 
[x]